A little hatin’ never hurt nobody

As a Jazz fan, I feel as if it’s my duty to hate on all things Rockets at this point. I found some amazing photoshop work after doing a google search.

Enjoy.

And my favorite….

The Mclovin’ Fund

Hillarious!

Websites that I like

These are a few of my favorites outside the usual (myspace, youtube, nba/nfl/mbl.com. espn etc.)

The Drudge Report: Although conservative, they cover everything in the political and current event world, leaving no stone unturned. I read this daily.

The New York Times: Need I say more?

With Leather: Hillarious sports blog about the idiots in sports.

Ball Hype: Links to every cool story/video in the wide world of sports.

Bill Simmons: One of my favorite writers for ESPN. His column is always worth reading.

Hype Beast: Fresh streetwear/sneaker blog

High Snobiety: See Hypebeast

Nike Talk: If you are able to get past all of the douche bags, it can be informative . I usually check for the release dates of whatever shoes I want and then bounce.

Digital Gravel: Great online store.

KarmaLoop: See DG.

Pick Your Shoes: Every shoe that you would ever want resides here. They’re pricey though.

Hip Hop Game: The most recent interviews, songs and stories in the world of hip-hop.

Stuff White People Like: Hillarious!

The Fail Blog: See “Stuff White People Like.”

Perez Hilton: Sure he’s a douche, but celebrity gossip and fuck-ups are a guilty pleasure of mine.

What Would Tyler Durden Do? Basically a better, more satirical version of Perez.

Film Drunk: Film news, insight and opinions brought to you by the same people who write With Leather and WWTDD.

Nintendo 8: Every Nintendo game known to man. I just beat Contra for the first time since I was a kid. (up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, a, b, start)

Facts of Life: Fuck you Cody.

City Weekly: I’m not a huge fan of their writers or opinions, but they do keep me up to date on the haps of SLC.

IMDB: Everything about movies. Everything.

College Humor: Immaturity at it’s finest

Ebaums World: See College Humor. I really am 6 at heart

If any of you have sites that may relate to these, and aid in me wasting me free time, I urge you to participate and share.

Creepy

While at Blockbuster the other day, I went over to the refreshments aisle to pick up a vitamin water and lo and behold found what may be the reincarnation of the Exorcist in the form of a Steve Nash bobble head doll.

There are no words.

I now have stomach cramps…

From laughing so hard.

Formidable! Do you hear that Boston!

Zach Randolph might be the laziest player of all time, and one of the dumbest. Just watch his Cribs episode.

Math 1060: hip hop and statistics

Good one.

Dear Matt Leinart,

Congratulations on your hard work this off season. Your dedication to training, film study and diet have us thinking that we can actually make the playoffs. We understand that being from USC, you are a very high profile athlete and your efforts to stay out of the spotlight shows the character that you have and reflects higly on your focus and dedication towards this organization. You are completely worth the millions of dollars that we owe you over the next several years. Our advice is to invest that money wisely instead of blowing it on the glitz and glam of the Hollywood lifestyle like many of your  cohorts.

Love,

The Arizona Cardinals

P.S. How’s your bastard child?

Nothing like partying with underage co-eds when you’re a Heisman trophy winner who hasn’t done shit in the NFL.

I can’t wait for this fuckbag to be the next Ty Detmer. I’m sure Peyton did the same things when he was that age.

My dog is gay.

Since I am not a father, but I am a pet owner, I have found myself falling into the category of those who talk about their pets as if they were children. It may be a bad habit, but as of right now it’s the closest thing to fatherhood that I have experienced (thank God).

However, over the last few weeks I have paid close attention to the actions of my dog Henry VIII (see gay pic above). It has become painfully obvious to me that he is gay (not that there’s anything wrong with that). He has all the tell-tale signs.

1) Beyond the usual ass-sniffing that all dogs do, Henry is also into ball and ass licking.

2) All dogs hump. Henry chooses to only hump males, including those of the human race.

3) He chooses his mother over myself at all times.

4) He takes photo’s gay.

5) He is neat, thin, single and in his mid-thirties.

6) He prefers cuddles, scratches and exposing his man rocket, to chasing the cat, wrestling with dad and fetching. Unlike my very straight dog Lou.

In order to further prove my theory, I took my dogs to the park the other day for their daily exercise/shit/out-of-the-house time. While Lou was busy wrestling and fetching with the other dogs, Henry was busy humping every piece of male ass in sight. Case and point.  I can understand being a little confused and horny as a dog and thrusting in an all male dog sausage fest, but NO! There happened to be a plethora of bitches at the park that day!  For some reason that only Elton John could explain, he mounted the males.  So not only is he gay, he humps at a rate that Collin Farrel would find offensive.

This of course is something that I am going to have to come to grips with. If anyone has tips on how to maintain a solid relationship with a gay dog (surrogate child) please help me out. It is not that I am against homosexuality, it’s just that I do not have that much experience with those of that orientation. I feel that this will be a good learning experience.

What’s worse?

The New Jersey hipster?

Or the New Jersey douche-bag?

Personally I choose the douche by a slight margin in a very tight race. The plastic skin, waxed chest and eyebrows, gallon of hair gel and spray-on tan and most importantly, the Zoolander “Blue Steel” kissy-face look did it for me. These dudes make me almost not want to be Italian. Disgusting.

Yet this is the state that brought us The Soprano’s. Astounding. No wonder Jay wants to move The Nets to Brooklyn. If these were the people that were filling up my seats I would have made the deal years ago.

I’m fucking Matt Damon/Ben Affleck

If you can’t laugh at this, you suck at life. Funny thing is, I usually hate Sarah Silverman, but this was everything that the Stewart/Colbert/Conan cameos were supposed to be. You have to love the celebrity appearances, especially the dude from Jane’s Addiction who just pops out of nowhere.

Matt Damon

Ben Affleck.

LOL